New Arrival Time

This is Emily posting for Kelley. I just got a call that they didn't get through customs in time in Chicago to be allowed to board their next flight. They'll be taking a later flight and will now be landing at 10:15 tonight.

The Sun is Setting

It's hard to believe that we're heading home tomorrow morning!! We are ready. Last night, the group embarked on the Pearl River Dinner Cruise. The food is...well...let's just say we all grabbed McDonald's an hour before we left for the cruise. But the views are spectacular. We witnessed a beautiful sunset. And the lights on the buildings are a sight to see.

Our guide Rebecca was very ill yesterday and had to go to the doctor (104 fever!). So our guide from Nanning, David, was in Guangzhou and filled in for Rebecca. Our family was thrilled to see him! Especially LiYun....we think she has a little crush. And she is going to hate me one day when she reads this. :) On the cruise, Scott and I had our first picture taken together, just the two of us, on the entire trip. Isn't that sad?? A hard part of this trip has been that we haven't had any time together, any moments to really connect and digest all that's happened. A date night is in order when we get home. A date where I can wear my fun new Chinese dress. :)








This morning, the group headed to the zoo. Grace particularly loved the panda which she kept calling a "teddy bear." It was so ridiculously hot and humid that we spent some of the time under covered tables downing water. (And dried fish...a popular snack in China that only LiYun and the kids indulged in. I thought I was open to trying new foods, but I've found I'm more reserved than I thought!) When we walked around, Carter was once again the main attraction. People would turn from the animals to stare and snap pictures of Carter. I started joking that we should throw him into a ring and charge people 2 yuan for a high five, 5 yuan to touch his curls, and 10 yuan for a picture. :)





All of the visa for the adopted kids were issued and picked up this afternoon, and it was exciting to realize everything is finally approved, processed, and completed. United States of America...here we come!

I have to confess that I've felt emotional and moody today. I am beyond exhausted. I've been sharing a bed with three people, entertaining kids or working to communicated with LiYun, completing paperwork, and more. I am never by myself, even when getting ready in the bathroom. And it's. driving. me. bonkers.

This afternoon, I walked by myself to get some Starbucks iced coffee. It was the first time in two weeks that I was alone. And it was so freeing that I felt an impulse to throw my arms wide and spin around like Fraulein Maria in The Sound of Music. Seriously. I need some personal recharging time.

While Carter has struggled with not having a schedule, he has done GREAT with adjusting to a big sister. He adores LiYun. But I guess he decided he wanted a little one-on-one time because he asked me this afternoon, "Mommy, can we go buy some lemonade and the rest of the family stay here?" So we had a little Mommy-Carter date to the grocery market.



Today was a turning point for Grace...she has been having a ball jumping on her big sister and having tickle fights. Her little voice is so cute when she calls out "LiYun!!" But this morning, prior to the big transition, she was still keeping her distance. And when Grace refused to sit next to LiYun on the golf cart at the Zoo, I caught LiYun sticking her tongue out at her little sister! At first, I was dismayed. But then I realized it's a good sign if she's feeling comfortable enough to express her true emotions. I am sure she has had her feelings hurt by Grace's "rejection" over the last week.

Some changes have definitely taken place over the last two days. LiYun has made an effort to hang out with some of the other girls around her age (one 13 year old just adopted, and a few siblings that are here). She is no longer sitting with me on the bus when we go places. And I'm a little sad, but I think it's a good sign she is being social. And she seems to be getting past the phase of simply wanting to please me. (But can I be honest and say I'll miss that pleasing phase a bit?) :)

We leave super early in the morning via 3-hour van ride to Hong Kong. We'll fly out to Chicago (flight time approximately 12 hours), and then have a short flight to Birmingham. We get in to the Birmingham airport, and 4:43 pm, and I can hardly wait to walk into our home. I have loved our time in China, but being crammed into a hotel room with three kids is testing my patience. And I'm ready to climb into bed where the sheets don't feel damp.

Pray for us as we journey home. This will be Caroline's second flight of her life, and it's a very long one. And I know she'll be a little overwhelmed when we get home. She is not accustomed to having so much space, and I will have to determine how to balance giving her privacy with ensuring that she engages with the family. Pray that she will be motivated to learn more English. She's become reliant on the translator, and we will have to push her to practice words. I think she's self-conscious.

Pray that she will be grateful for the family she now has. I sense that she likes all her new material belongings and freedom. Actually, she told me the two things she loves most about being in our family is freedom and happiness. (I had asked her this question.) I asked her to clarify what kinds of freedoms. And she said painting her nails and buying more books! I informed her that we would establish some rules when we got home such as a bedtime, etc. She moaned a bit but seemed okay. I guess I'm just nervous that she's happy because she has new clothes and polished nails. She's been asking for more and more things. And she even brought me my mascara this morning and asked me if she could put it on. (I said no.) I don't want her to view me as a genie who can grant all her wishes. I want her to view me as someone who can provide love, comfort, protection, advice, assurance, a shoulder to cry on, lessons on life and faith, and motherly attention. To be perfectly honest, she's been a bit sassy tonight. And a little demanding. (As in charge her iPod. Now.) And I feel a little disenchanted. But this isn't anything I didn't expect. And she and I already communicated last week that we realize each other is not perfect and that we will disappoint each other at times. However, reality isn't always fun. And I share this so you don't think we live in a constant state of Rory & Lorelai bliss. (reference to Gilmore Girls)

Thank you for all the comments and emails. I can't access blogger to respond, so please know that I will when we get home. Your insights, advice, scripture references, and prayers have touched me so deeply. It is comforting to know I am not traveling this road alone. I have the Lord guiding me, but also amazing people who are lifting us up along the way. I am humbled by how many people have invested a few moments of their day to check in on us and our journey. Thank you!!

I'll leave you with a fun little list:

What I'll miss in China:

noodles for breakfast

the language ( I am picking out phrases now!)

great deals on books, clothes, etc

room service and no cleaning dishes

good coffee and tea

the cities and unique cultures

What I won't miss but will remember with a smile:

stares

smells (all kinds!)

chicken feet

being in a hotel room with three kids

squatty potties (I wish I had Carter on video when he first ran up saying "They have potties that go all the way down to the floor!!!!!)

four of us sleeping together in one bed

feeling sticky and sweaty all the time

Next post will be from home. Woo hoo!!!!!!!!!!

Dressing Up

All the families from our agency, Lifeline, who are in China now

Some of the older kids and siblings

I bought a Chinese traditional dress when we bought LiYun's, and she wanted me to wear mine for the group pic. Carter insisted on buying himself an outfit and then wouldn't put it on because he said it was "too hot."

Lil' Miss Grace (who was quite a diva during photos and wouldn't pose)

My beautiful daughter

I don't know if the detail of the dresses show up in this close-up, but they're beautiful. I think I'm going to host a Chinese party just so we can wear them. Ha! :) Who wants to come??

Scott finally got a smile out of Grace by throwing her up in the air.

Doesn't LiYun look so grown up? I seriously miss her pigtails. From the back, the lines of the dress resemble the style worn by Kate's sister in the royal wedding. And LiYun's silouette could definitely rival Pippa Middleton's. (Scott is begging me to delete this line. But it's true! I'm so impressed with LiYun's grace, elegance, and maturity. She carries herself very well. But I'm also mourning the fact that she is not a girl but rather a young woman. I wasn't expecting that.)

Happy 4th!

The last couple of days have gone really well. LiYun has had a few moments when I thought she seemed sad. But she gets more comfortable with us everyday. Today as the five of us walked to the pool for a swim, I told Scott that it's beginning to feel very normal to have a 12-year-old.

Yesterday, we went to the US Medical Center for the required testing, reviews, and immunizations. LiYun only had to have 2 shots, so we were thankful for that. She didn't flinch at all and even went in to comfort a 13-year-old girl who was so scared of the shots that she began crying.

Okay, wait...that was Saturday. HA! I am totally losing track of which day is which. So yesterday....yesterday we went to Liwan Plaza shopping mall. Our guides, Rebecca and Lily, are awesome. And they have activities planned for each day. So they helped the families shop for traditional Chinese dress, pearls and jade, and other items. Many parents buy pearls for their children for a big occasion such as high school graduation or marriage. When I explained to LiYun that we were buying her a pearl necklace for her wedding day, she said, "Too early???" I laughed and explained that we're saving them for her wedding day...which is YEARS away! (Twenty years away, according to Scott.) I think she thought for a second that she was being whisked away to America for an arranged marriage. :)


Because they string the pearls while you are there, you can customize your jewelry by adding additional beads, black or pink pearls, etc. So LiYun designed necklaces for both herself and for me which tiny pearls and then some aqua beads. They're really pretty!

When we got back from the mall, I noticed LiYun had a small tear in her shorts. I told her I could sew it, but she insisted that she do it herself. She found the sewing kit and stitched up the hole in just minutes. I'm telling you, this girl is resourceful!

LiYun met a 12-year-old whose family is adopting a little girl. And they live in Vestavia. What are the chances of that? The girls may even end up being in school together. Piper was so sweet to LiYun, and I translated that she wanted to be friends. When we got to the mall, LiYun walked up to Piper and took her hand. They walked like this for several minutes...it was so sweet! Unfortunately, they dropped hands right before I snapped this picture.

At the recommendation of many families with adopted older children, we headed to a HUGE bookstore with Lily and her 15-year-old daughter. This bookstore has 6 floors. And my new daughter and I discovered that we share a passion for books. And even more specifically ... classics. My CLS friends, you will love that she grabbed Jane Eyre, Anne of Green Gables, The Little Princess, The Secret Garden, The Little Prince, Little Women, and more!

We bought most of these in bilingual versions that have the English on one page and Chinese on the opposite page. So we can read the books together as she learns our language. She also picked up several Chinese books so she can keep up her Chinese. And then I got some elementary level books that teach cultural fairytales and stories American children learn when young. It's a great way for her to begin learning simple English words too. We even bought some Harry Potter study guides that have Chinese and English so we can read and discuss (as we both have read them all and love them). Before we left, she also picked out two books: one with stories about a mother's love, and one with stories about a father's love. People were staring at us as we carried gigantic piles of books to check out. But LiYun and I were in literary heaven. (We actually have to buy a small suitcase tomorrow in order to get all the books home.)

In addition to classics, she reads all sorts of genres. She even bought a reference-type book in Nanning that gives tips for everything from how to clean to how to help popping ears on an airplane to the best methods for cooking rice. Our guide Lily was impressed that she was reading this and joked that her teenage daughter Angela needed to read it. I told LiYun that when her English gets good, she needs to teach me all the wisdom she learned from this practical book.

Last night, I could tell LiYun was a little down. We asked her if she wanted to call her foster parents, and for the first time, she said yes. So she had a brief conversation with them and then talked to her best friend. And after some rounds of UNO with Scott and me, she was smiling big. I can't remember if I already shared this, but she loves to throw down draw 2, draw 4, or skip for her daddy. And when she does it, she gives him the cutest look!

I have noticed a change in LiYun in the week that she's been with us. At first, when we would say, "I love you" to her, she would respond quickly with an "I love you." But now, when we say it, she says "really?" or "yes?" almost like it is starting to sink in that we do love her. I believe we're getting past the point where she says what she thinks she supposed to say. When we tell her how beautiful she is and how everyone here tells us that she is so stunning and elegant, she acts surprised. She seems like a confident girl, but deep down, I believe she has always struggled with confidence, given her orphan status. And she's shocked that people here think so highly of her . It's sweet to see this change and I love that she's seeking reassurance and confirmation from us, like "Yeah, you really love me?" It's a step in the right direction.

Today, we headed to Shamian Island to shop and play. The island is where we stayed when we came to adopt Grace (White Swan Hotel). The agency now puts all families in the Garden Hotel in the main part of Guangzhou. Being on the island made me miss it though. With statues, tall old trees, beautiful flowers, cobblestone paths, and unique architecture, Shamian Island is so charming. We took some pictures on the Red Couch at the White Swan...this is a tradition for adoptive families.


We purchased a few more souenirs and then let the kids play at the playground behind Lucy's. LiYun ran around playing with Carter and Grace and helped them climb.


I have mentioned before how much attention Carter gets here in China. He is getting just as much attention in Guangzhou as he did in Nanning. Many Chinese carry umbrellas to protect their skin from the sun because pale skin is more beautiful than dark skin in their eyes. I think Carter's pale skin is why he is such a celebrity. That and is curly hair. Anyway, he gets LOTS of attention everywhere we go. I am even picking up the Chinese phrase, "he is so beautiful" when people here say it. ;o) Grace gets a lot of attention too. People here comment on how very coordinated and strong she is for a 2 1/2 year old. Everyone assumes that she is the newly adopted child and that LiYun has been with us longer. But when Grace pipes up and says something in English, they get confused and start asking questions. It is funny to see people's reactions.



While watching an older Chinese boy hang on the monkey bars today, Carter informed me that he wants a 7-year-old brother. I giggled and told Scott (who gave me the eyes and "scolded" me about getting our son to lobby for another adoption). :) I told Carter that I thought he would enjoy a younger brother because he would do a great job taking care of him. Carter replied, "But a big brother would take care of me!" Seeing all the kids here, from ages 1 to 13, I can't help but think that we're not done. To be honest, I fear we'll end up with 7 or 8 kids. That was most definitely never my plan. :) We just need to get home and settle down as a family of 5. But it's pretty funny how many families share that they start having an inkling about another adoption while still in China!!

For now, I'm ready to focus my attention on my sweet kiddos and learn the dynamics of life with such a wide age span. I always love being in China, but I am definitely itching to get home now so the youngest two can get back on a schedule. I am eager to show LiYun her home and city. And I am so anxious to see my family and friends. I miss you all.


It was fun to spot other American families today because most were sporting red, white and blue. I hope you all have a wonderful July 4th! Enjoy some fireworks for us!