6.28.2011

Settling In

I have to admit, when I woke up this morning I thought LiYun might have changed her mind about being adopted by us. After some challenges in translations last night and then feeling her toss and turn in bed, I feared she might be doubting her decision. But when we met up with David, she told him she was very happy. (Although she did admit to not sleeping well.) The rest of the day kept getting better with each hour.


While at the office to do the interviews and paperwork to legalize the adoption, Carter and Grace stayed with their Aunt Noelle in another room. When we got back, Carter had out his "briefcase" and said he was doing paperwork so he could become LiYun's new brother. I am always amazed by the concepts that Carter understands at the age of 3.


Tomorrow, we will visit the orphanage where LiYun lived from ages 2-5, prior to foster care. We asked through David if she had any good memories there, and she said "not really." But she is looking forward to seeing a few of her friends still living there. While in foster care, she had to make monthly visits so she befriended the girls during those times. We are bringing candy for them, upon her request. And we are also donating a basic digital camera, as that was an item the orphanage director said they needed. I do like the idea that a new camera will provide nice photos of the children that will be treasured by adoptive parents. We inquired whether we could get any baby pictures of LiYun (from the age 2, when she was brought to the orphanage), and they said they would try to find some. Please pray that they will follow through with this. I would hate for LiYun to not have any physical representation of her life before the age of 5.


Speaking of pictures, she asked us if we received the pictures of her birthday that her foster brother had sent to us via email. We never received them. I know God is over all the details, so I'm not too upset. But it would have been amazing to get those pictures back in November and have an email address to contact her throughout the wait.

We had another great lunch with the help of David and LiYun ordering for us all. Then our guide left us for the rest of the day and we all went back to the hotel to rest. The afternoon seemed like a turning point for LiYun and me. We played UNO with Scott and Noelle. We did crafts with the kids. And she and I had an hour long conversation on google translate. I learned that she enjoys badminton and in-line skating. And she would love to learn taekwando and to play the piano. (Her expression was priceless when I informed her we have a piano at home.) After dinner of Pizza Hut pizza (her request), she and the kids went swimming in the indoor pool. From her expressions, she seems even more joyful than yesterday. I do worry, however, that she may be disappointed when we resort back to the daily grind of life. :)

One of her friends is coming to play with her on Thursday morning, so we look forward to being able to glimpse a part of her life and history here in Nanning.

Just a few sidenotes... when Scott brought back the pizza, we discovered they had included several pairs of plastic gloves! I guess they think such a greasy mess should be handled with care.

And while doing crafts, LiYun used glitter glue to decorate a sign that says "I love you -LiYun" and presented it to me. While I know she doesn't really love me yet, and she may even think it's just what I want to hear, I was touched that she would even feel comfortable expressing a sentiment like that. And when she calls out to us, she says "Mommy" and "Daddy"... I still do a double take hearing that in a voice that isn't coming from a toddler.



To be real, it hasn't been all fun and games. Carter had a MAJOR meltdown earlier because Scott went to get the pizza without him. And I later heard LiYun imitating it to her friend on the phone! :) He and Grace have both pulled away from LiYun at times, and I had to explain to her that they're into being independent...they're not rejecting her. There have been moments when I have had to set expectations or limits and I fear crushing her spirit. And there have even been a few moments when I've missed life with just the four of us. But I think that's because there's not yet the intimacy of knowing LiYun as well as a mother would know her 12-year-old after raising her for her whole life. I know that intimacy and normalcy will come in time. What I can honestly say is that she seems to fit into our family. And I would have never dared ask that she be as brave, patient, mature, understanding, and loving as she has been in the last 30 hours. Wow...has it really only been one day?

Oh, and one more sidenote....I forgot to mention yesterday that Noelle and Stuart missed being together for their one-year wedding anniversary so that she could come with us!! So we are so thankful to them both for allowing her to join us on this journey. She has been helpful in so many ways. I will be so sad when she flies home on Saturday. (And thank goodness LiYun is so hands-on with the kids...I feel more confident about surviving the rest of the trip without Noelle's help!)

Love to you all.

15 comments:

Melissa said...

oh kelley. i'm just praying and praying for you guys. liyun is absolutely gorgeous and vale and i have been staring at all of the pictures and talking about the moment when we'll meet her. i'm glad it's going well, so divinely well, and yet i can't imagine the range of emotions that have to be felt by all of you.

i'll definitely be praying for mr. carter and his adjustment as well as for the rest of you.

we had our little cls get together last night and REALLY really missed you. can't wait to see you soon.

Kristi said...

I had to giggle at your Pizza Hut glove story. We went to a Pizza Hut in GZ. I tried to order water - they brought us out 5 glasses....I asked for "bottled water", they brought out a pitcher of water....I asked one more time saying "plastic", they brought us plastic gloves. At this point, my cousin (he lives in Hong Kong & came to visit us) he said "just drink the water".

Prayers for your fam. Love the pics! and isn't it just like a big sister to imitate her crying little brother :)

GLS said...

Thank you for letting us be a part of this beautiful time for your family ... we are truly witnessing something so special!

A Cup of Cold Water said...

kelley and family,
we don't know each other, though we've emailed. you were a step or two ahead of us in our first adoption and i gleaned so much from watching your time with grace. i have been praying for you and liyun and am thanking God for her transition. of course it's so multi-faceted and only beginnging but it's clear that God is working! (as though we'd expect anything else but Him at work! :). thankful for this gift of adoption!
erika

Mary Ann said...

Kelley,

You don't know me, but I started reading your blog when you guys adopted Grace. I have enjoyed so much following Grace's entrance into your life. Carter and she are so precious. I am now keeping up with your adoption of LiYun. You and Scott are amazing. I know God gets the glory in this whole thing, but, really, you and Scott are amazing.

Anonymous said...
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Joel and Lee-Anne said...

You were heavy on my heart early this morning :) I am ALL OVER checking your blog OFTEN and was SO excited to see a new post!!! :) Thanks for being honest - not only are we thankful to get the real picture, but it will help you in adjustment to be real (with yourself, God and us). More on that later.....
LiYun is PRECIOUS (I cant figure out how, but she resembles you.....no really!!!)
Deep breath. Low expectations. Feel our prayers and God's empowering love as you begin this new chapter.
Much love

Stacey Carden said...

Kelley, I went on a mini vaca over the weekend with my sister-in-law so forgive me for just now posting I am just now catching up on everything! OH MY WORD...she is beautiful and I can't believe how well it looks like she is doing...braiding Grace's hair, holding your hand, walking hand in hand with Carter...how amazing!!! I am SO excited for her and for all of you! WOW!!! I can't wait to continue to watch your journey! Miss you friend!

Brecca and Hank said...

I am in awe of your journey with LiYun. Thank you for sharing your heart with us over these weeks. To God be the glory great things He has done! Praying and praying!

Deann Scholl said...

Another beautiful post with gorgeous pictures of your adorable family of FIVE!! So thankful that things are going so well. I had to laugh when you said she imitated Carter....such a "big sister/big brother" thing :) Things like that happen in our house all of the time. I am sure all of you have a hundred different emotions so please know that you are in my thoughts in prayers. What an amazing journey it continues to be.

Kelly said...

I had to come for my daily cry;) Just beautiful! LiYun is a stunning girl. It is almost like you can see the goodness pouring our of her sweet eyes. I will be praying for your transition to parenting her. This is such a beautiful testimony from it's very beginning! What a blessing you are experiencing as a result of your obedience!!! He is SO Good!!!!

Kelly

Teresa M. said...

Praying for you. I woke up about 1 am Mon morning and you were heavy on my heart. I prayed for a peaceful transition and that LiYun would be brave. You are shining His light!! Congratulations and thanks for sharing!

Mike and Barb said...

Thanks for the updates! Thank you for sharing the good and the not-so-good parts. I totally understand - the new "normal" will take time, but you're off to a great start!
Barb

JJ said...

Kelley...I have not been able to get on my computer lately and so I had to catch up on everything. This is just so amazing. What a beautiful picture of God's inescapable love! Li Yun is gorgeous and I can't wait to meet her too. Just wish I could remember more Mandarin! :) I am praying and just so amazed at your obedience to the Lord in this and what beauty will unfold in your family through your faithfulness to Him. I love her!

Prentices said...

Like others have said, you've been on my mind and in my heart as you all adjust. Amazing to see God at work in the details, and praying that every day gets a little easier and more familiar for the five of you. Love you...and your cute top too, btw. ;)